getting to know – (11) stepping back

Dear readers and listeners,

i had always in my mind, that making changes is a hard step and so i created the barrier inside my head. I’m still on the roead of getting to know, but felt not the urge to do the daily writings. But as understood in the DIP Process, writing out is like reading a book (thought i never liked reading, because of the „i must do it for homework“ thing), it indeed creates a deep connection with the writer and with the words i read. So for writing out, it identifies the deep connection i thought i lost. Lost in the mind, is an illusion i will clarify within myself. As everything from the beginning to the ending is here (and never gone), it keeps me on track. It pushes me to change actually and definitly. I always came back to the wiritings when things went not as i was „hopeing“ for. It gets me back to the initial state, where i want change and didn’t write out what was inside my head. So for this, i realised, that its time. Time for the changes i proposed for a long time. Actually i did take breaks, because it overhelms me everytime i realised the „living“ thing, the actions/reactions i’m doing over and over, not stopping them. Feeelings and Emotions that struck me and keeps my head sinking and my eyes falling to the ground. Thinking of the „things“ i could have, when i ignore the information and realisations i made with the desteni material. It’s absurd to think, that „ignorance is bliss“ – because, realising what keeps someone one his track will never make a good ending. So, i’m continueing on my journey to life and my journey to myself, from the past memories, to the present reactions and decisions i created.

I actually found a way with singing and/or wiriting lyrics for music i actually work and think for. Cool stuff is coming down the line, presenting myself, self and the inner trouble makers inside my head.

Alot information is here at the desteni forums and Blogs, vlogs one can discover and see an mirror of the self i created my self in.